Grief Is Unpredictable

by | Nov 27, 2017 | Uncategorized | 0 comments

Many people are uncomfortable with grief.

Many don’t know what to do when a friend is grieving because we live in a society where any show of emotions besides happiness is frowned upon.

How often have you looked at a person who has lost a loved one and you think to yourself “It’s been x months/years, why are they still so sad? They should move on.

Should is the key word here.

Who made up the rule on how long one can grieve for?

I read a ‘spiritual, self-help’ book years ago that said for every year one is married, one need six months to recover after a divorce or lost of a spouse. That means if you were married for 10 years, you must grieve for five years!

Grief is unpredictable.

Everyday is different when one is going through the grieving process.

One day you are fine, and the next BAM! You are walking down the street, eating a cinnamon bun and tears are rolling down your face.

A song on the radio can make you sob uncontrollably.
A scene on your favorite TV show can remind you of your loss.
I was watching “This is Us” two nights ago and I started crying when one of the lead characters hugged the other.
Shopping at Costco and seeing my father’s favorite treat — cream puffs stopped me in my tracks.

Often, there is no explanation as to why some things, songs or food are triggering.

It’s been a month since I lost my father.

Grief sucks.
It is sneaky.
It is unpredictable.
It is painful.
It is heartbreaking.

But, it is necessary to feel and process the grief so you can start to heal.

Be present when a friend is grieving. Show up, bring coffee, or a cinnamon bun.

Be there to witness their grief. You don’t have to say anything.

Photo by Bara Cross on Unsplash

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